Bad Luck
How To Turn Your Dating Luck Around
To people who didn’t know him, John seemed to be just another socially awkward, average guy. If he didn’t date much, it was because he was too busy studying, or working at his part-time job, or for some other boring, perfectly normal reason. Everything was not as it seemed, however. The truth was that John had a secret, and John’s secret was the fact that he had the most abominable luck getting dates.
John had tried everything from joining clubs, to hanging out at the local coffee shop, in an attempt to improve his luck. He’d even tried talking to women at the local grocery store once or twice. Nothing worked. Something always went horribly wrong. John, however, was determined not to give up. One day he spotted an advertisement pinned to the university bulletin board, offering reasonably price math tuition. His classmate, Julie, was the tutor. He decided that this time his luck would change. Unfortunately, it was not to be.
Shortly before their first lesson, John broke out in a case of acne that would have made a toad envious. Every inch of his face and neck seemed to be covered with the horrid red bumps. Nobody, including his doctor, could recall ever seeing anyone with such a bad case. The doctor gave him a prescription for acne medication, while his mother surfed the Internet searching for information on how to get rid of acne quickly. He decided to cancel his tutorials until the outbreak had subsided. By the time his skin cleared up, Julie had gotten engaged.
A few months later, he met Sarah. Though, ‘met’ was, perhaps, too strong a word for it. It was more like he saw her five hundred yards off and promptly fell in love. After a few discreet inquiries, he discovered that she belonged to a sorority right next door to the one and only fraternity that had invited him to join. The fraternity and the sorority often held joint activities. Sadly, as John was undergoing the initiation ritual, which involved wrapping oneself in bedding quilts, and pretending to be the Statue of Liberty, the entire sorority, Sarah included, walked into the room. John quickly retreated in embarrassment, his initiation rite now completed.
John finally decided to try on-line dating. It was the only thing that he had not tried yet. He figured that, at the very least, it would give him the opportunity to get to know a girl before actually meeting her. He could even warn any potential dates in advance about his alarming tendency to make truly weird first impressions, and hopefully they wouldn’t hold it against him. As far as he was concerned it could turn out to be a win-win situation.
Within days John had his first response. It was from a young woman planning on becoming a teacher. When he asked her how she felt about occasional out-breaks of acne, she said that she didn’t care; it was the person underneath the acne that counts. A few days after the first response, he received another response from a young woman who claimed to be particularly partial to men in togas. Before long, John had more dates than he had dreamed possible.
John no longer has problems approaching women, or getting dates. Thanks to on-line dating, his self-confidence has improved, and his luck along with it.
Social Distortion – Bad Luck
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